And Here We Go Again :-/
If you have ever experienced depression and / or anxiety, then you will have an idea of what I am about to talk about. It is those up's and downs, the high's and low's that every person who has experienced as such, goes through, on any given day, week, month and year. It is a daily fight to stay happy some days.
Trusting others becomes a painful experience, both learning to trust and the most painful part, when trust is broken; over and over and over again. That is why most people who have/do experience depression and anxiety, have a very hard time making friends and an even harder time, learning to trust anyone.
The swings of emotions, from high to low, causes me to feel so freakin' totally unbalanced and even more so, when there is no real reason, or not much of a reason, to be upset at the time of rolling emotions. With on the most part, can be because of almost any type of rejection or seeming rejection, of any type or kind. Also bouts of anger can swing a person both ways too. I can count many times this week where I have been very upset (angry) and also cried, vigorously at times.
If this has ever happened to you, know that you are not alone. There are a lot of us emotional 'thinkers and livers'. Our lives consist of one big ball of emotions that seem to roll into each other mostly because we allow ourselves to 'think' more than we should, about everything. Today is no different from others. Woke up in a decent mood, got a bite to eat, came home, been craving a ciggie all day, feeling sleepy, but been, ok and then, out of the blue...There you are sadness/depression. Right there, waiting patiently for me to swing your way; waiting on me to engross myself into you deeper and deeper, so as the sadness can truly sink right in. So that maybe, just maybe, that emotion will get a good cry from me and then depression really sets in deeper. Then just as slowly and painfully, life goes back into a spiral of neutral feelings and then happiness, hopefully and then it all starts all over again. This merry go round can happen once a day, many times a day, or on the rare occasion, only a few times a week or month, but for those of us who are truly dedicated to our emotions, really tied into them, will experience those feelings, many times a week, if not many times a day.
Sighhhhhhh...Here we go round on the merry go round, the merry go round, the merry go round....wheeeeeeeee.....